


Meeting the parents

by Fifionline



Series: Eggsy & Roxy fake relationship adventures [2]
Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-12
Updated: 2015-09-12
Packaged: 2018-04-20 09:34:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4782479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fifionline/pseuds/Fifionline
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Could Eggsy save Roxy from the awkward blind dates her parents are imposing on her? The answer is yes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Meeting the parents

**Author's Note:**

>  Again written from a prompt found [HERE ](http://daishannigans.tumblr.com/post/113403565095/butfake-datingmarried-eggsy-and-roxy-au-roxy) I find myself really inspired by this fake relationship!Reggsy prompts =P

\- “So, is the plan clear, Eggsy ?” says Roxy as they go over it one more time before the special mission that awaits this evening.

\- “Crystal clear, Rox ! I'll be there at 7 pm sharp as planned. I have to get ready now but I'll see you there.” answers Eggsy !

 

And with a wave and a wink, he's gone. Roxy sighs and wonders once more why she has to do this. Then she remembers the last evening she spend at her parents' and shudders. No, she can't go back there alone and endure again their tries to fix her up with young men they know from friends or work. The last one had been a disaster, he was so boring and clearly insistent when Roxy was nothing but interested.

 

So when her parents suggested another dinner at home with them and the nice guy they wanted to introduce her to, she had just replied that it wouldn't be honest of her to meet him when she was already seeing someone else. The look of happiness on their faces as she said it, made her feel guilty for lying to them but as long as they stopped pestering her, she would be ok. Except, she wasn't. As soon as the initial bliss had worn off, they had wanted to know more about her new relationship so she invented and invented more until they had wanted to meet her boyfriend. But how could they see a non-existent boyfriend ?

 

That's when Eggsy suggested that he could help. She had been complaining to him a lot about those awful blind dates and he was really supportive of her. With their line of work, they couldn't really keep friends in the real world, as they sometimes called it, and they had quickly become each others best friends and confidants over the months. And that's how they'd come to tonight.

  
Roxy was in the living room with her mom when the doorbell rang and she tensed instantly. That was it, the moment she feared since the day she accepted this dinner. She really hoped that Eggsy would give a good performance and that her parents would then stop annoying her about boyfriends.

  
\- “Leave it, honey. I'm gonna get the door.” announced Roxy's mom. “Martin!” she then called out “Come to the living room, our guest is here.”

 

Roxy couldn't really hear what was happening at the door but there was something strange. It took her mom a long time to come back to the room and by the time she was coming close, Roxy started to panic as she heard the conversation.

 

\- “Don't call me Gary, Mrs M.! Only me mum calls me that and just when I'm in trouble. Well, I'm often in trouble anyway !” Followed by a big laugh. “You can call me Eggsy.”

\- “Right...Eggsy.” she heard her mom reply reluctantly.

 

Oh my God, what was happening there ! Roxy didn't get more time to think about it because her mom and Eggsy entered the room at the same time as her dad did from the other door and everyone freezed. Eggsy was supposed to wear his best suit and his glasses but instead he had jeans on, his winged sneakers and the ugliest black and yellow track jacket she had ever seen him in, on a matching polo shirt. He even had a cap on. What the fuck was he playing at here ?!?

 

\- “Oi, Rox, babe !” says Eggsy as soon as he entered the room, not deterred by the visible uneasiness of everyone around.

 

He went to kiss her lips and she turned her head at the last minute hugging him instead, his kiss landing on her cheek. She took the opportunity to whisper angrily in his ear

 

\- “What is going on here, Eggs ?”

\- “Trust me, Rox, ok ?”

 

As the hug ended, Martin came to him to shake his hand and Eggsy requested a high five saying that they were practically family from now on. That had to be the most awkward high five to ever happen on Earth but it seemed to Roxy that her dad was too astounded to even refuse doing it. Once done, Eggsy just took Roxy's hand and went to sit on the sofa, guiding her to sit on his laps.

 

Mrs Morton fled to the direction of the kitchen as her husband sat on his armchair trying to regain composure. Roxy was used to act and be under cover but lying to her parents and playing this game was proving to be harder than she had expected. Even more with Eggsy going off-script. She slipped slowly from his laps and sat on the couch next to him.

 

Mrs Morton came back from the kitchen with refreshments and some snacks that she offered around. When they were all served, the sat there in silence before Mr Morton broke it.

 

\- “So...Eggsy, how did you meet our Roxanne ? You're working at the tailor shop with her, isn't it ?” he said, clearly wondering how a guy dressing like that could be working for a tailor.

\- “Yeah, but I'm not all smart like this one” he answered patting Roxy's thigh “I just do whatever needs to be done. Deliveries, pickin' up trash, things like that y'know ?”

 

Even if Roxy's parents, kept smiling like the well-mannered English people they were, she could see the corner of their eyes twitch as it was becoming more and more difficult as Eggsy went on.

 

\- “So, we had a work event in a club and she was all over me this one, init hunny ?” continued Eggsy, pressing a huge wet smooch on Roxy’s cheek. “Like I always say, posh girls luv a bit o’ rough, eh luv?” he added winking at Martin before turning his grinning face to Roxy.

 

She could do nothing but smile back at him and hope this nightmare would stop soon. Seeing her parent's mouths drop behind Eggsy's back, they were thinking the same thing.

*

As the night went on, the awkward moments kept pilling up, culminated over dessert when Eggsy spat his champagne on the table before declaring

 

\- “Fok ! This champagne tastes like shite, init ? No offense Mrs M. but do you have beer instead ?” seeming genuinely disgusted.

 

Roxy's mum left for the kitchen without a word and her father was all red in the face, clearly trying his hardest to remain calm and polite.

 

They had decided beforehand to leave together and as they said goodbye to Mr and Mrs Morton on the porch, Eggsy insisted on hugging her mom and high-fiving her dad again. Roxy just waves awkwardly at them before stepping inside [Eggsy's car](http://www.fastcar.co.uk/fastcar-assets/2008/06/corsa_0071-592x444.jpg), an orange monstrosity with orange neon lights underneath she had never seen before.

 

\- “This was a complete disaster !“ announced Roxy sinking in the passenger seat as they sped away to Eggsy's house where they would spend the night.

\- “No it wasn't !“ countered Eggsy vehemently. “I have to admit that I feel guilty for trapping your parents like that, Rox. But I'm pretty sure that they've learned their lesson by now. You'll see.“

*

Roxy was in her pajamas and getting ready to watch a movie with Eggsy when her phone rang. It was her parents. Ignoring Eggsy's triumphant face, she answered the phone and went to the bathroom for some privacy.

 

\- “So ? How did it go ?“ asked Eggsy when she came back to the living room.

\- “It was the strangest conversation I've ever had with them to be honest. They said that they were pretty sure that tonight was all an act and that if I was willing to go this far to tell them that I didn't want a boyfriend, they would stop putting so much pressure on me.“ she said first. “But also that if you were really my boyfriend, they would try to accept you for who you are, even if they don't understand what I would find in such a relationship.“

 

Eggsy grinned from ear to ear before replying.

 

\- “I was sure this would work ! They're like you Roxy, they might appear posh and uptight at first...“

 

He had to interrupt himself as Roxy started hitting him and they play-fought for a minute.

 

\- “...but in the end, they are incredibly loving and understanding persons. They only want you to be happy, they were just showing it the wrong way.“ he ended.

 

Roxy was so overwhelmed, she felt the need to hug Eggsy hard.

 

\- “Thank you, you're the best of friends, really !“ she whispered to him.

\- “You're welcome, honey ! Now let's watch this movie !“


End file.
